The Power Of Perspective

If you’ve read my blog you know that perspective is my nemesis, but that is artistic perspective.  There is the other perspective, the kind I try to use in my daily life, the kind I use when I want to stop myself from being judgmental, when I try to put myself in the shoes of someone else.

Today was a tough one. I posted last week about my Dad having an accident, and although he is out of the hospital things are not well. When you are weeks away from your eighty-first birthday and sustain a concussion it really takes its toll on your brain. Dad has been with my sister for a few days and while he has moments where he seems his old self, more often than not he is confused. I am still hopeful that he will regain some of his memory and cognizance. What worries me as well is the rest of my family. I have three sisters, each with our own families and health issues. The stress and burden of caring for an aging loved one can take its toll. It isn’t about not loving someone, there is a great deal of that, but just how much it can break down communication between siblings, between couples, destroy families. I talked to my sister earlier this evening and told her how I felt. We all need to be respectful of each others lives and needs. Two of the girls are carrying the weight of what is happening to our Dad. I live hundreds of miles away. Yes, I can sympathize, I can and do make phone calls for them, but the reality is that it is their lives that are affected. I have said often in the last few days that it is easy for me to suggest something because I am here, and they are there. I told both women today that I don’t want this to come between us, most of our family is in Ireland so there is just us. If we want to truly honor what our father and our mother would want, then we need to stick together. Everyone needs to recognize that what is important to one isn’t important to another. Perspective is a powerful thing. When we as the individual suffer we see it only through the prism of our own lives. When we feel pain, it is no more or no less than what someone else might feel, but it is our pain, and for that it should be respected. In situations such as the one we find ourselves in now it is easy to look at someone else and think that something is trivial, or less important that our “stuff”. It’s not. I want to make sure that throughout this process that no one of us feels alone, singled out, or less valued. Relationships can be damaged beyond repair with a single sentence. I love my Dad, but I love my sisters as well. I would like to get beyond this and be able to look back, say we did our best, but that more importantly, we remain as sisters, as friends. Tomorrow my Dad is back in the hospital for a test that could lead to a pacemaker. Wishes for good karma, and prayers are appreciated.

I don’t have the finished “up-cycled” cabinet door to post as of yet. I am putting multiple coats of the Martha Stewart chalk paint on it. I had done two yesterday, but upon closer inspection earlier today I sanded the corners down and redid the paint. It is a project that I am hoping to sell and want it to be perfect.

What I did accomplish today is a watercolor. We spent part of our afternoon in the Temecula Valley Cheese Shop, one of my favorite places. The owner is a friend, and was kind enough to spend time with us as we consider opening a place of our own. We had some wine, and a plate of cheese. It was a little respite from my worried and troubled mind. Inspired by our afternoon, I did a painting of a cheese plate that I put together. Too bad I can’t share.8 14

 

A New Attitude

I am definitely feeling a little less stressed about my art. This blog and its daily project have really made me rethink a lot of things. As usual I wasn’t sure what it was I wanted to do today so I looked through my photos for some inspiration. I had taken this photo somewhere along the road back from Vegas. The cafe is abandoned, or at least looks like it is, but what I really loved was the feel of the building and in particular the striped awning. Even though the windows were covered in paper, the awning gave it a festive look, as though waiting to be reopened for a party. The other thing I liked about it was that I found it reminiscent of an Edward Hopper painting. I have always loved Hopper’s work, I think if I had to choose a style to paint in it would be similar to his.

I have made note in previous writings that my perspective is not all that it can be. I really tried on this painting, which by the way is a watercolor. I carefully measured out distances, and tried to get as much accuracy in my perspective as I could, but quite frankly I still struggled. The good news is that at some point I stopped caring. I pushed ahead and finished the painting. I realized that no one who is looking at this painting is going to care all that much if I didn’t get the doorway exactly right, and I am trying not to care either. I’m not making a photocopy but trying to capture an essence or a feeling, and I hope I have done that. In the end I am pleased. I am learning to not be so hard on myself. To be good at anything you need to practice. My artistic skills have been on the back burner for more years than I care to say. As this project continues I will be working more and more. I have seen some improvement already not only in my work but in my attitude about it. It has been almost a month since I began this year-long project, I look forward to seeing what happens down the line.Image